Notice: All forms on this website are temporarily down for maintenance. You will not be able to complete a form to request information or a resource. We apologize for any inconvenience and will reactivate the forms as soon as possible.

Just Like Lindsay

LindsayLohan-blog.jpgOn the way home from work last night, I found myself thinking about the latest self-inflicted travails of actress Lindsay Lohan.

Now, even if you don’t pay much attention to the latest pop culture chatter about celebs’ dirty laundry, it’s been almost impossible of late to avoid hearing about what’s happening with this troubled 24-year-old actress. Turn on the TV, surf a news website or stand at the checkout counter, and there you’ll likely see Lindsay’s face and be exposed to the latest chapter in her sad story. Lindsay has barely been out of jail a month (for violating probation), and she’s already failed two court-mandated drug tests.

Frequently (and recently), Lindsay has talked about her desire to change and to take responsibility. So the thought that went through my head yesterday went something like this: Lindsay, why can’t you just choose to get it together, to say no to this stuff that’s so obviously wrecking your life?

The genesis of that thought honestly wasn’t judgment or criticism on my part as much as it was honest perplexity about why Lindsay continues to make such bad choices. (I know that addiction plays a part, and I’ll get to that in a moment).

Almost as soon as that idea traipsed through my noggin, though, another, much more personal realization followed in tow. Well, Adam, why can’t you just choose to get it together? Why can’t you “just choose” not to eat too much junk food or surf the Internet too much or any of the other things you do that you know probably aren’t the healthiest choices?

I don’t know for sure whether that thought was my conscience or perhaps even the Holy Spirit nudging me. But I instantly realized that Lindsay and I perhaps have more in common than I’d like to think. Sure, the magnitude of our struggles—and the consequences—are quite different. It seems pretty clear that Lindsay’s got some serious substance abuse problems, and “choosing” your way out of addiction is tricky business that requires the help of other people.

In the end, though, I’m not so different from Lindsay. Like her, I’d like to think that my good intentions to change—to floss more, to eat less fatty food, to spend less—is enough to combat bad habits and break out of my own little addictive ruts. And, just like Lindsay, I find myself making the same well-intentioned promises to myself pretty regularly: This has got to change, I think. But for the most part, my bad habits remain just as firmly entrenched as Lindsay’s seem to be.

I want to believe that some part of Lindsay Lohan really wants to do better, to change, to be free. But simply saying she’ll try, even wanting to do so, doesn’t get the job done. Nor does it for me.

So let me conclude with two ideas. First, this little train of thoughts reminded me that I need to be very careful when I drift into anything that resembles heartless condemnation of others’ weaknesses, because I have plenty of my own. And it turns out my “foibles” tend to have the same root causes as celebrities’ character flaws: selfishness, rationalization, lack of self-control. And second, real change—as in reshaping bad attitudes and rehabilitating bad behaviors—is hard, ongoing work. As a Christian, I believe it’s only possible, in fact, with God’s help, and with the help of my friends and those who love me.